Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Tuesday 31st JAN 06 11:40pm


First off, i would like to wish all my chinese friends a very big GONG XI FA CHAI. Hope that you guys got alot of red packets and are feeling oh so very rich now. For me, i suppose you could say i got a windfall this year where the red packets are concerned. The reason is only because i decided to go back to my mother's place this year.

Some of you might ask why i decided to go back to her, after all that i have written about what i have felt about this issue some time back in my blog. All i can say is, i have my own plans. I want to break out of this vicious cycle that i am in now. With so many problems in my life. But to break out of this, i will need help. And at this moment of time, that old man with my mother can provide me with such help. I do not have a choice. Weighing my options over and over again, the conclusion is that i have to make some very big sacrifices in order to make a life of my own. So, that's what i am doing now.

During New Years' Eve, i had dinner at the new house with my sister, mother and the old man. I apologised to the old man about my past actions and hoped that he would take me back in. In the end, i suppose you can say that he half relented on letting me stay. Of course, he started with his "When i was younger" speech again. Giving comments and saying how his problems are greater then mine and all that shit. Essentially, he was just trying to lecture me about giving me a "lesson" in life. I swallowed it all in. I have my own plans and reasons for coming back home, and i intend to reach my plans. Even if i have to stand the crap that the old sack dishes out every now and then. On a personal level, i was really very unhappy about having my reunion dinner at the new place. Even my sister has the same feeling, as she revealed to me after the dinner at home. We had a long and good chat at the roof garden and i came to realise how lonely and alone she felt when i was away.

I must be the worst brother in the whole wide world. I never realised that my sister was suffering in silence all this time that i was away. I WILL mkae it up to her, someday. This, i PROMISE.

I went to watch the movie "I NOT STUPID TOO" with my sister on New Years day. It's the FIRST time i every watched a movie with my sister in 19 years. My verdict?


The movie really connected with me and my sister. We laughed, we cried. There are some people i know who told me they will never in their lives support local production. But you know what? Go watch this movie. You will NOT regret it.

5/5 Stars. You can trust my judgement. Come on, how many times have i been wrong in the things i recommend huh?

Ok.... maybe you shouldn't answer that.....

My mother has the habit of showing off. Just these few days itself, she has invited many friends to the new house for "Open House" Parties THREE DAYS in a row.

I know the house is BIG. But come on.... this is really abit tooo much.

BoonYong, Jay and Jerald also came for the "open house" party. LOL

I know BoonYong may have done certain things to me that he should not have. But in any case, i still treat him as my own brother. Maybe i owe him somethings in my previous life. But you know what? I love him all the same.

Today, i had a great reunion dinner. There were only 3 of us, but it was the most wonderfull time we have had in a very long time.

Me and my sister met up with our real dad and had seafood at the international Seafood place. Our dad may have made his own mistakes in his time. But he is still our father no matter what happens. We had a GREAT time, having a great dinner of lobsters, prawns and crabs.

My dad is doing pretty well now. He got a job in china as a sort of supervisor. The very fact that he can take us to seafood and have a SGD$400 meal means that he can take care of himself now. That's all i need to know. That he is well have able to support himself.

Ironically, with all the money my mother has, she cannot give me and my sister what we really want.

The connection between parent and child. My dad can be poor and still working for others for a living. But you know what? He shows us love. It cannot be explained. It's just there. The words, the tone, the eyes, the body language. It all shows us he LOVES both me and my sister. TRUE LOVE.

And that's something my mother will never be able to buy or give.

By the way. My driving Test is tomolo.



I hope i pass man.

Can pray for me?


EarlGrey blogged @ 11:58 PM | archives

---*make it real*---

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